Category Archives: chapters
Flat Earth Unroofed
It was memorable, his first visit to the cottage. It opened his mind.
‘Most people,’ said Mac, ‘live in a flat-earth mind. They’re just busy doing. What I do in timecraft is to unroof the flat-earth mind, and underneath you discover a little blue planet of awareness that does not think; it knows.’
This made sense to Hudor; he already had an inkling of this.
‘There are ways to do this, to move from one to the other. What you find is that the little blue planet in your mind is attuned to this blue planet around us; it resonates with the natural world.’
‘Some people’s minds are ossified, they have become like a bone. Others are in chaos, falling apart, without a centre. But there is a place of stillness. And in that stillness you can find the stream of time that enables you to move in time and space. This is just one thing you can do with this knowing.’
Hudor was aware that his heart was beating fast, and he had almost stopped breathing.
‘It’s all in the stillness,’ said Mac. ‘Listen if you can. I need to teach you to still your mind, heart, soul and body. In the stillness you become more real and can move through that which is less real. In that way you can get inside the summer house, for you need to meet the girl.’
He knew her name. It had been written in the dust as he lay looking at her and then had been unwritten. Wind blew in his mind. But he could not remember it now, out of the Wood.
‘Come with me into the Wood,’ said Mac. ‘To the mere.’ As they walked, Mac told Hudor to imagine that a butterfly had landed on his stomach. He needed to breathe gently so that the butterfly did not fly away.
When they got to the lake, Mac sat down cross-legged by the shallow stream that flowed into the lake.
‘Put your fingers in the water,’ said Mac. ‘Let the water run over them. This is how you should be – like the water. But you are all entangled. I will teach you the art of disentanglement. We need to disentangle your senses. Allow your senses to expand around you.’
Hudor became aware of the sound of a woodpecker pecking in a tree. He could feel the water running over the nerves of his fingertips. He could see the sunshine dappling the water, and the clouds that were passing overhead reflected in the stream. He could smell the earth, and the dung of the ghost cattle. He could taste the air as he breathed – it was a taste he had never known before.
‘What you are doing,’ said Mac, ‘is observing what you are sensing. You need to disentangle your inner seeing. Then I need to teach you the true names of all things; the names disentangle the things they name. But you’ve got to get beyond knowing in order to disentangle yourself from the shell we grow around us. Once we have done this, we can become fluid in the invisible streams that flow all around us.’ Hudor understood intuitively. He was yet to experience the bigger streams, though.
In the distance a dog barked, and the moment was broken.
‘Your mind is wandering,’ said Mac. ‘Focus on the water until you find the white stillness, the heartbeat of time itself.’
Mac put his hand on Hudor’s back and suddenly he was aware again. At that moment Mac pulled them into the water. There was a moment of fear, a moment of ekstasis, and suddenly they were elsewhere, standing in a pool of water which bubbled in five places. A ruin stood in front of them; it was clear what it had once been.
A man stood on the bank with a dog. It had a thick coat with a slightly yellow, oily sheen.
‘Watcher, I greet you,’ said Mac. Hudor could feel the health of this place in his bones, in his blood. It was as if every particle of his body danced with joy.
‘Do you know the story of the beginning, and how the opening tide of life came about? The watcher asked Hudor.
‘No,’ said Hudor.
They sat on the grass and the man began the story.
‘He will speak in riddles,’ whispered Mac.
‘There was a beginning. And that beginning started at a point, a certain place, and it contained the seeds of the beginning. The island of Ge is that place, and it contains the seeds of the beginning. Some call it a big bang, and others the opening of the tide of life. And that beginning planted other beginnings. The principle lives on. The beginning had seeds that were planted. New things begin. And there are places in Ge where that beginning still lives. We are in one now. The place where you put the white hare is another one. But these places are under threat. They are being hunted and destroyed. Poisoned.’
He looked at Hudor, who was rapt with attention. ‘Listen to the wind, and the wind will reveal more to you. But it is time for you to return.’
In what seemed like less than a heartbeat, Mac and Hudor were back in Bentley Wood. Although they had travelled through water, they were not wet.
‘Go home,’ said Mac.
At home, Hudor hugged his parents spontaneously. They were packing to go on a trip for the Fowler. They looked at him, surprised and pleased.
Walking in the Wood, following a visible track, a sound made them hide. As they followed a cattle track by the edge of the trees, Mac pulled him into the cover of the leaves.
‘Don’t move!’ whispered Mac. ‘Not a word…’ He passed his hand over them and uttered a word in a strange language. Men dressed in black with the wolf-like dogs who trained in the Wood walked past. Once they had gone Mac relaxed, but he took them back to his hut via a different route.
‘What was that word you used?’ asked Hudor.
‘A tongue,’ said Mac. ‘A word for concealment. The first peregrini who walked among us concealed themselves as men, as watchers and wanderers, and they had a tongue that could hide them. I made it appear to the dog-wolves as if we were just part of the forest.’
‘That’s so strange,’ said Hudor. ‘It’s just reminded me that when I leave Bentley Wood I forget thoughts I’ve had whilst I am there.’
‘That’s the sleepiness out there in the world,’ said Mac. ‘It’s part of what they do,’ he added. ‘But it’s not safe to talk about it yet. Take a pebble with you from the mere, any of them. Then you’ll find you remember out there, and won’t get sleepy again. But don’t let anyone see it.’
Hudor suddenly had the sense that there was one who was going to pull a plug out of the world of the tide of life, that all that was good was going to disappear down the plughole, and that he would be caught up in the whirlpool with nothing to hold on to.
Finding a cattle trail, Mac led them back to one of the entrances nearer Hudor’s home. Hudor was glad he was with Mac: he didn’t want to meet the ghost cattle on his own. They seemed to have the ability to just appear and disappear nearby, although they left real footprints and real cowpats.
‘It’s not the cows you need to worry about,’ said Mac, ‘although the superstitions about them are useful for keeping people out. It’s some of the wolf-like dogs who have bad hearts. Being a dogkeeper’s son will help you, though. If you get into trouble, find water, either in the ponds or the springs bubbling up in the grass. The bad ones won’t come near that.’
‘Why’s that?’ said Hudor.
‘I’ll talk to your dad,’ said Mac, ‘and see if you’re ready for your apprenticeship. Then I’ll tell you. You also need to be wary of the green parakeets. They spy for the Fowler,’ he added.
Mac smelt the air. Lightning. A spear of death. Without a sound he beckoned Hudor to follow him. Hudor knew better than to ask him where they were going. He soon realised they were heading towards the lake. As they drew near to the lake, Mac dropped down and began to crawl quietly to the brow of the hill. Hudor knew that below them was the summer house. This was where the girl came sometimes, the daughter of the Fowler. Mac whispered in his ear.
‘Watch the balcony.’
Soon a girl dressed in a bleached dress appeared on the balcony. She was slight but tall, with amber-coloured hair. Unbidden, a vow came into his heart. I will protect her with all my craft. He lay there, suddenly aware of his breathing, the beating of his heart, the pulse in his neck, the smell of the earth, the face of the girl.
Then the Fowler came out. Hudor had only seen him at a distance. He, too, was slight and tall. His face was hard to make out, but his hair was dark. He was dressed in black and had brought a mirror out with him – it was full length. He left it with her.
She then began to do a series of exercises in front of the mirror. Faces. She pulled different faces until in the end it seemed as though she became someone different. But in the stubbornness of his heart he could see her underface, as he saw the underwriting on the palimpsest.
And then suddenly, she collapsed, like a puppet on a string. The Fowler came out, for he, too, had been watching, and carried her inside. A servant brought the mirror in.
‘It’s time to go,’ whispered Mac. They left as quietly as they had come. Despite the warmth, Hudor felt chilled to the bone. As if the very marrow had been sucked out of him.
When they reached the edge of Bentley Wood, Mac said, ‘Come to my cottage tomorrow. I will tell you more.’
and the Palimpsest of Bentley Wood
So it began here, with a forgetting of colour, the colour of flight. It began with the woodpecker dead on the grass in the back garden beneath the apple tree, its wings nailed to the ground, the wind ripping them apart. No more would grass grow under where it lay. He did not know whether this death was aimed at him, whether it was a random act of cruelty, or whether it was aimed at all of nature. Green and red feathers were dimmed by death, no more a laughing call, or swooping flight, or the prediction of rain. That was only the first sign. Storm.
The white hare danced, boxing outside his window. He knew it could not be so. He was in a waking dream, a dream so real it was as though the hare was fighting an invisible foe, and white fur tinged with blood flew in the air. In the dream awake he saw the ordinary street, cracked pavements, tarmac road, grass verge, houses and gateways begin to dissolve, and a nothingness was there. But in the ordinariness he saw gold shining, and he knew it was the end of all things. He got up at once to run but a voice said, ‘Write and draw what you watch, where you walk, in your lane and beyond as far as you can. Watch and write and draw what you capture on water-marked paper. For that will preserve the warp of your world against that which comes, and those who come. Watch those who make a weakening of the self, for they are walking. Learn to hide your whole self.’
As he awoke, he felt an emptiness and an aching loss within his heart and he knew that he had heard true. Outside his window was the apple tree, the dead patch in the grass, and beyond that the high wire fence to the school field. But it was quiet outside. It was not a school day.
He dressed quickly and went outside into the front garden. By the road, against the hedge, a white hare trembled. It did not resist his hands, and it was like a knowing from his dream that he was to put her – for the eyes told him it was a female – in his satchel. The eyes looked human. He thought he saw an old man dressed in black on the corner of the road – the man with the scarred, marred face who lived in Bentley Wood. But when he looked again there was no one there. He felt irrationally guilty and wondered if he had been seen, but all that was there was a robin on the rubbish bin.
Everywhere there were people who worked for the Fowler. The Fowler had recently banned parents from teaching their own children. Every child now had to go to a controlled school.
He began to walk along the road on his way to Bentley Wood. The Wood had other names but these had been defaced. He thought he might release the hare there. As he turned the corner of the lane, he jumped. The old man was there looking at him. He found it hard to look at his face, but the eyes were kindly.
‘Need to learn how to hide yourself, I reckon,’ said the old man. Part of him wanted to stop and ask him why he said that, but he kept on walking, giving him a surprised sideways look as he went.
‘Go to Friend’s Meadow,’ said the old man quietly. And then he was gone.
He always felt better amongst the ancient woodland. Friend’s Meadow felt too close to the approach road and the houses so he went further into the woods. He followed the meadow that ran between the two sections of woodland, as if he was following an invisible line on the ground. He was being pulled to the left and to the top of this ancient piece of land.
Suddenly he could sense the rich smell of cow dung. The ghost cattle had been in this part recently. They were called ghost cattle because they had the ability to appear suddenly without being noticed.
He felt he should stop at the spring that bubbled up into a shallow pond. He knew for a moment that he was safe and not being watched. He knelt down and carefully took the white hare out his bag. The hare looked at him calmly. He carefully washed the blood out of its fur, but there seemed to be no wound; it was as if the water had healed the wound.
The hare watched him with onyx eyes. Out of the corner of his eye he saw two other hares appear, watching him. He was still. He noticed that the cut on his thumb had gone when he had put it in the water.
He knew the hare had wanted him to see this. He could not explain it to himself, but he felt in that moment as if he knew something, as if he knew they were ancient watchers. In watching, they were guarding something, something they had shown him. And then they were gone.
He knew it was time to go home. It wasn’t good to linger and draw attention to this place. He went home via a different route, picking up conkers as he walked to give himself a reason for being out.
As he walked home he thought about the old man. Mac, he was known as. Hudor knew that he worked in Bentley Wood below the big house. The big house was where the Master lived – the Fowler as the locals called him. Hudor was allowed in the Wood, which had open spaces and meadows and lakes, although it wasn’t open – it was all fenced off. He was allowed in because his Dad worked the guard dogs in the Wood. The old man, Mac, also helped with the dogs. He felt he should talk to Mac. He was excited about the white hares, but he didn’t want to think about the woodpecker.
Hudor wished he were invisible. He could imagine his skin peeling off him if he were to be caught in the gaze of the Fowler.
He was where he shouldn’t be, walking as stealthily as he could. He could hear his breathing and see his breath in the early morning frosty air. Suddenly somebody laughed, and he nearly jumped out of his shoes.
He looked around. A bird with a red crown and a green body walked round a tree trunk and out of sight. Hudor could see nothing else.
Hudor walked on; he needed to get to the top of the hill. Suddenly the green bird with the red crown undulated past him. It had a yellow rump. He heard the laugh again. It was the bird. The bird landed on the tree. ‘Yaffle, yaffle,’ it laughed.
As the bird laughed for the third time, Hudor was suddenly aware of black clouds gathering, faster than he had ever seen before. He needed to be quick.
It was then that the bird spoke. He would remember that moment for the rest of his life. As the clouds seemed to speed up, time around him seemed to slow down.
It was an oracle. He knew that now, but he didn’t know it then. ‘Follow the scryer to the path of the seed and the underwritten sentence or your soul lose…’
The bird turned its head and long beak to one side and looked at him with golden eyes and black pupils. Suddenly the eyes blazed with a light that left him with a longing in his heart for he knew not what.
And then it was gone. A green woodpecker! he thought. He didn’t know there were any left. And one had died in his garden.
He was by now on top of the hill. In his vision it was a dark night, and there was no light pollution, only a clear sky streaming with starlight. Silence was all he could hear. His heart strummed with joy and his mind was as clear as the sky.
He was floating just a foot above the ground, pale clothed. He could see in front of him an open book. It was out of reach, but he knew he must find it in real life.
His eyes felt suddenly bright with light, and he could see that underwriting lay faintly on the upturned page. Overwriting in a different language and pen could also be seen.
He felt as though he was part of nature, his body humming with the music of every particle. But he also sensed a counter-vibration, something wrong, a storm coming. As he watched the sky, the moon began to turn red.
He remembered it all as if it were yesterday. Then he was back in this dimension, trying to get home without being seen, ordinary daylight all around him.
At supper he asked his father about Mac.
‘Old Macarius?’ said his Dad. ‘Not all who wander are lost.’
This didn’t help much, thought Hudor. He knew his dad liked to give short riddling answers, often from ancient books that had been lost.
‘Yes, old Mac,’ said Hudor.
‘He’s one of the last peregrini,’ said his father. Hudor didn’t like to ask more, but he didn’t think calling him a falcon was particularly illuminating.
‘Have a chat with him,’ added his Dad, unexpectedly. ‘Ask him to show you some of his — woodcraft.’
‘I will,’ said Hudor, and he did.